My COVID Diaries: in reality, how good is a virtual world?

A lot of phrases exist that we are all sick of hearing during lockdown, but cannot stop using.

I have done my best to remove the word “unprecedented” from these columns where possible, although it has been a challenge.

One phrase I have found myself using frequently – mostly after describing something positive – is that “of course, it is not as good as real life”.

I wonder, though, if real life does not always trump virtual.

WellVet Virtual

If you had asked a week ago whether WellVet Virtual (which, at the time of writing, took place yesterday) could have been anywhere near as good as the in-person event, I would have said of course not. The magic of WellVet Weekend has always been the people, genuine connection and intimacy of the space it created. I doubt we would ever have chosen to host a virtual event had COVID‑19 not hit.

Yet, at no point did I feel as though I was one person sat alone behind a screen. In fact, it was more bizarre than simply a feeling of connection.

You know how sometimes a scene from a film will implant itself falsely into your memories, as though you were really there? I am writing the day after the event, so may still be in a fog of exhaustion and adrenaline, but scanning my memories of the day, I see myself physically there with everyone else.

I remember being sat with Rosie Brandreth‑Poynter chatting about The Great British Bake Off. I remember laughing with Adam Robinson in my sitting room as I did burpees.

I remember feeling so close to the other panellists for the Mind Matters session as we spoke honestly about our mental health journeys. All 386 of you were sat in my house – chatting, laughing and having the most amazing conversations.

Teleported

My brain does not remember being sat all day in a pair of headphones interacting with a glowing computer screen.

It seems more conceivable that at 8am on 23 May I uploaded myself into a virtual reality – let’s be honest, the scenes from Willy Wonka’s television room currently do not feel any stranger than the real world we find ourselves in.

I had no idea it was possible to feel so together, while being physically so far apart. Technology, social media and virtual communication have had negative impacts on modern life; I am not disputing that. But after what I experienced yesterday, I wonder if we have been too quick to dismiss virtual connection as not good enough.

It has always been the mission at WellVet to bring the conversations, tools and community to as many people as possible. In many ways, a virtual event was the most inclusive way we could possibly have done this.

How often do members of our profession miss out on this kind of connection because of time, responsibilities, distance, finances, health problems or confidence?

Those who are unable to travel (for a multitude of reasons) were able to join from their homes. Those who care for others could join with them. Those who would have been too daunted to attend a residential weekend were able to join without anxiety – and we hope may feel confident enough to come in person next time, whenever that may be.

Inclusion

Virtual reality can never replace person‑to‑person connection, for those of us who are lucky enough to find that easily. But isolation, loneliness and disconnect were endemic well before coronavirus.

By considering the ways virtual events include so many, I realise by constantly dismissing virtual connection as “not as good”, we are denying a huge number of people the chance to take part.

The virtual world is every bit as real as reality, and the connections we felt yesterday were not just the stuff of dreams – or Willy Wonka. Real human beings sat behind those screens, and I miss you all today – it is strangely lonely in the house without you.

Of course, we cannot wait to see everyone in person again and to hold another residential WellVet Weekend.

But when life returns to normal, we must remember all we have learned from our strange virtual experiences – including how powerful virtual connection can be when you are feeling isolated and alone.

Stay well x